Happy times come bashing into me when I least expected them to be but they're ever so temporary. When they leave, the loneliness they leave behind double the emptiness that had once been felt.
It's so hard to describe my fluctuating moodswings, I'm not sure if it's the external pressure that's affecting me or it comes from within me.
I'm not a pessimist nor an optimist in anyway, I just respond to any kinda of blocks or chunks of difficulties thrown at me. If it's tiny, I'll scratch away the itch. If it's extremely sharp, I'll nurse the wound. And the routine goes on and on and on.... sigh*
It's really very depressing that everynite before I go to sleep, I keep wondering what's awaiting for me the next day. When I open up my eyes, a new journey will begin with my very first step.
I'm just 19 turning 20 soon, but I've started to feel really tired of my life. But I ain't a nutter as to do something suicidal :P I'm so damn looking forward for my future. Still, it's very tiring. I think I need some fresh air now.
Till here.
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